It Becomes Even More Real

I received my college diploma in the mail today.

Oh shit.

It shouldn’t be that big of a deal, really. And in many ways, it’s not. I’m more upset about the fact that all it says that I earned is a “Bachelor of the Arts” than anything else. Excuse me? I earned two majors. Just because they were in the College of Arts and Sciences, and just because they were both B.A.’s doesn’t mean that I want my accomplishments to be looked over. Maybe Creative Writing and Anthropology weren’t the hardest majors to pull off. I still worked hard. I still earned that recognition. Stupid system. Stupid system that simplifies everything just to make things more “efficient”.

Okay, end mildly to moderately upset rant. In and out does the trick.

Getting my diploma today meant that I was done. I had passed all of my classes, I had crossed every t and dotted every i. I had finished paying off every cent that I owed Miami…now just onto student loans.

My college years are officially behind me.

The offending document. Please excuse the floral comforter.

The offending document. Please excuse the floral comforter.

Like, legitamently behind. Over. Done. Can’t find an excuse to go back to undergrad. Even as my boyfriend goes back for his last year of school, I won’t be. Instead, come the end of August, I’ll be on a sailboat, cooking for passengers and crew instead of moving into a new apartment or house while buying school supplies and getting excited for class.

Can you tell that I’m scared? Terrified, possibly.

I mean, this means that I have to go be an adult. Bad enough that I had to face that today when I was getting a YMCA membership and the lady smiled sadly at me when my mom tried to haggle a discount for me, being her daughter. All she said was, “She has to be under 18, and she’s 21 now. She’s an adult.”

Oh. Fuck.

Now I have to start figuring out big kid things, like credit cards and full time jobs and finding my passions in life and paying rent on a monthly basis and health insurance and 401ks. I still don’t really understand those things.

But, as per usual with me, I’ll be putting off any and all of those things for as long as possible. Things don’t really become important to me until they are screaming in my face. The future is merely tapping me on the shoulder now, although quite persistently.

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